The Joy of Home.
An intense study into the role of who I am.
Lesson Five
Who are you? The Joy of Home is about finding out who you are, and changing and challenging yourself to discover who you really are. The Joy of Home study is here to show you the masks you need to remove, the garments that are not your own, and help you put on the true you. Most people do not discover who they are, because it takes work and effort, and perhaps a lifetime. Some people try to hide who they are because it causes arguments and frustration to their family members and friends. Don’t be that person, be who you were created to be. If you are in a relationship with someone who doesn’t like you growing into the real you, leave them behind, because your past cannot live in your future. The present is the cutting off point of the past, so you can put on the new in your future.
In lesson four we started to build a foundation for money. We will return to housekeeping, but some money issues need to be tackled first.
What is wealth?
- Debt freedom
- Paying cash for everything
- It’s not buying whatever you want, and doing whatever you want, whenever you want. It is about self-control.
Wealth does include money but also
- Health
- Well-being
- Balanced family
- Peace, joy, comfortable home.
- Land
- Pets, animals
- Productivity
- More than enough
- The blessing on everything you do with your hands.
- Honour, respect – given and taken.
Some people only see power and material things that they can buy, these are poor people. Rich people are givers, hard workers, those who enjoy life, and are joyful in all circumstances. Wealth can include money, however, what is in our hearts is where the true treasure is.
If you know, that you know, that you know, your marriage is based on a lie, or you are being physically abused, financially raped, verbally abused, and you stay, you are not wealthy, not healthy and you are living in a place of destruction. If your friend, or child were living this lifestyle, would you tell them they were crazy for staying, and that a better life was in their future if they cut the relationship and walked freely into the future without them? If you are in an unbalanced relationship, why do you stay?
FEAR? Unhealthy soul ties? But I love them? Poverty? I have children and they need my spouse.
Here is some truth for you. You reap what you sow. If you are afraid, you reap fear. If you choose to walk in lies, you will reap falsehood. If you expose your children to emotional abuse, you give them fear, an unbalanced perception of truth, and a lifelong legacy of battling what their heart believes about themselves that they learnt as a child. This is where generational curses are born.
Wealth can be money, but it can also be successful living. Generational curses can be cut off, but it has to start with you, and you need to cut its head off. That means you need to pursue successful living, healthy living, and a righteous life.
Have you ever had a bad day, and bought something just because it made you happy? You get it home, and the euphoria is gone, and you can’t remember why you bought it in the first place. Two years later you take it to the thrift store with the price tag still on it. The need to buy overtook true freedom and joy. You wasted your money, and it didn’t do a thing for you. That is because happiness is something out there that you need to bring towards you, while joy is what is inside you and you give it out.
If you are full of fear or hatred, that is what you give to others. You cannot give love, if you hate, are angry, are full of sorrow, or believe the world is a nasty place, and you live in a nasty place. I am sure you have heard, love your neighbor as yourself. If your spouse hates themselves, why are you expecting love from them? If you are saying, “I love them so much,” and they are abusing you, how much love do you really have for them? You may lust for them, but love doesn’t put up with abuse.
Happiness comes from the outside in, and lust comes from the outside in. Lust is not love. Lust will bind your heart to make you think it is love, but love does not hate. Love and hate can’t occupy the same space. You can’t love and hate someone at the same time. If you love someone, that means you respect and honour them. You may hate what they do, such as you dislike their drinking too much, or their overspending, or their addiction to pornography, but you love them as a person. However, how much do you love yourself, if you allow yourself to put up with this behaviour in your home around your children.
Only you can define wealth. I would rather live in a peaceful neighborhood, have good food on my table, have clean warm clothes to wear, and a safe truck to drive, than live once again in a stressful marriage to an alcohol abuser. I would rather have my bills paid on time, than to be mad because the bill money went to selfish sins. I would rather have little with peace and joy than much with hatred and chaos.
Am I where I really want to be in life? No, but I work at it day by day, even if it is so far in the distance, I can only see them in my heart. I do have a shadow of it. I live in an urban home, that is peaceful, with my family and pets, and have a backyard garden. I work, I write, I sew, I garden, I preserve, I enjoy my time. This is wealth to me. Money cannot buy these things. These are things that I sow, and I reap.
What is important to you? What are your values? We talked about values earlier in these lessons. Mine are my faith and family. When I go through my day, I must prioritize my time, because what I want to do, there isn’t enough time in my day for it. I love to sew clothing, but caring for my family overshadows that. I wake up between 4 and 5 in the morning, because my time with God is important. Writing is important to me. On my days off from work, I clean, bake, cook, garden, do my shopping and take time to speak and listen to each family member in the house. After that, if there is time, I sew.
What about self-care, you may ask. I do that every single morning for two to three hours. What is important to you, that is what you will do. If you are worried about paying your bills, that is what you will do, worry. If you focus on a family member’s sin, all your energy will go towards that. If you want to be debt free, you will become debt free if you focus on that. You have to decide what wealth is to you and seek after it.
What does all this have to do with Joy of Home? Housekeeping and housework? Money and debt freedom? This is a study about you. Who are you? What do you want? Your life is a season, after season, after season, which simply means you change constantly. You are a moving, growing being, who matures and ages. What is important in this season, will not be important in the next, or it will deepen in the next, carrying you onto a new path to explore. If you haven’t changed in a while, then you remain in your past, stale, and rotting.
You need to define what wealth means to you.
You need to know what you value.
You need to know what season you are in and take hold of a vision that will carry you into your future, where your wealth and values come together. Where you live in peace and joy. Remember joy comes from within and radiates out. Love comes from within and radiates out. Happiness comes from the outside and is temporary. Lust comes from the outside and is temporary.
Take time to write and think about this lesson. Know what you value and what wealth means to you, so you can run after those things.
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