May 4th, 2024
When I was living with my husband, it was the most crushing, horrid, moments of my life. Yes, we had some fun together, and laughter here and there, but for the most part, I lived a married life, in a singleness sense of the word. I was depressed, stressed and lonely. If you live with an addict, whether drugs, alcohol, gambling, adultery, pornography, you know what I mean.
Every fibre of your being hates this person at the same time you love this person. They lie, steal, yell, spend money they don’t have, lay around and blame you for their problems, and they say the meanest things. Until you come to the point of realizing this is not right, you will stay festering in it. I don’t mean, after crying for an hour alone in your room, and you say I have had enough, I mean, you wake up the next day, and mean, “I have had enough.”
I played Russian Roulette every time he got mean and drunk, or happy and silly, or came home so drunk he was hallucinating. I packed my bag, unpacked my bag, packed my bag, unpacked my bag. I felt relief as I packed, and guilty when I went to leave with my bag. I played this game for too long, until one day, it happened, I left in tears, but it was the best day of my life.
I am not going to lie, it was difficult, but it needed to be done. I cried; I wondered what he was doing with out me there. I didn’t phone. I had nothing to fill my mind anymore, so I began to learn who I was in Christ, and it hit me like a freight train. It was at that moment of realization that He, Jesus, had the answer and the key to my prison cell, that it became easy.
I wish I had known what I am going to tell you, before I left, because I would have left sooner, and healed quicker. There are three things I want to tell you:
- You are righteous in Christ, and you have the same authority as He does because He gave you, His name.
- God is absolutely good, and He is your source and supply.
- You are made in God’s image, and you were created to bring God glory.
In 1 John 3:4, it says, “Anyone who indulges in sin lives in moral anarchy, for the definition of sin is breaking God’s law.” (TPT) How do you live a sin free life? Stop indulging in moral anarchy. Is it possible to live a sin free life? Yes. Once you start, it is easy. If it is easy to sin, then it is easier not to sin, because Jesus and Holy Spirit are inside of you, helping you. You have to decide to pick up your bible and read it. You need to make a determinate decision to listen to faithful teachers and preachers who are not afraid to teach what the Word really says. You need to pray daily and obey God. You have to decide that the Word is your final authority, not your beliefs, not what your spouse says, not what the book you are reading. God’s Word is true and your final authority. What it says, you do and believe.
“And you know without a doubt that Jesus was revealed to eradicate sins, and there is not sin in him. Anyone who continues to live in union with him will not sin.” (1 John 3:5; TPT) Jesus made the Word His final authority and didn’t sin. “Ah, He is God,” you may think, but even Jesus was born into the world and had to find Himself in the bible. He had to read the Word and believe the Word, just as you and I have to do. Jesus read, “Love thy God with everything you got,” and He did. He read, “Do not steal,” and He didn’t. Jesus had to do like we do it to make it legal, because if He didn’t, He wouldn’t be able to become the second Adam and take back what Adam gave Satan.
Jesus had to learn the scriptures, even though He was the one who created the Heavens and the Earth. He had to have it in His heart because the heart speaks. If He didn’t have a strong belief in His heart, He would have failed the test with Satan after forty days and nights fasting. He would have caved in when brought before Pilate. What would have happened if he didn’t take all the lashes, or freely give Himself to be nailed on a cross? His faith and belief in His heart, spoke.
When your spouse speaks, they are speaking what is in their heart. When you speak, you speak what is in your heart. Masks only stay on temporarily, but the heart never lies. When you say, I can’t take this a minute longer, and do nothing, you know what your heart is saying, “yes, I can take more of it.” When your husband tells you he will not drink during the day, so he can attend his daughter’s graduation, and you come home to find him drunk, his heart is telling you the truth. Alcohol is more important than family. Do you believe his heart or his words?
Will you believe his lies or the truth he speaks from his heart? Are you willing to continue to listen to the lies or listen to the truth? “But I love him…He is my children’s father…He promised…” The question is: WILL YOU BELIEVE HIS LIES OR THE TRUTH HE SPEAKS FROM HIS HEART?
“But the one who indulges in a sinful life is of the devil, because the devil has been sinning from the beginning. The reason the Son of God was revealed was to undo and destroy the works of the devil.” (1 John 3: 6; TPT) God says in His Word, drunkenness is a sin. Are you going to believe God or not? Is the Word your final authority?
“Everyone who is truly God’s child will refuse to keep sinning because God’s seed remains with him, and he is unable to continue sinning because he has been fathered by God himself. Here is how God’s children can be clearly distinguished from the children of the Evil One. Anyone who does not demonstrate righteousness and show love to fellow believers is not living with God as his source. “ (1 John 3: 9, 10; TPT)
We know that sin brings death. What do we say about alcoholics or drug addicts, “that substance is going to kill them.” So, we believe that, that addiction to drugs and/or alcohol, is going to kill the person. Satan comes to steal, kill, and destroy. We know for a fact, that this person who is a drunkard is going to get worse, by drinking more, his body is going to start to shut down, and he will eventually loose his job and perhaps develop psychological damage. His body odour will change, his emotional state will change, he may begin urinating in the closet or bed, he might be stealing to provide the substance his body needs, and he will not be eating properly. And you want to stay close to this? This satanic mess. Do you realize that demons are swarming around your spouse like flies around dung?
Why do you believe this is the best for you? You might be saying it is not the best for you and your children. It must be because you still live there. You say you want better, but your heart says, I can’t leave him, if I do, he will die. My children need him. I need him. I love him. What does God’s heart say?
Does God agree with the way you are living? If not, why are you living that way? Did you know that God already has a plan for you? If you picked it up, He would deliver you, but you must believe His Word. From the mouth the heart speaks.
Start listening what the hearts around you are saying. Start listening to your own heart. Not the mask, the heart. REMEMBER, GOD HAS A PLAN AND PURPOSE FOR YOU, A PLAN TO PROSPER YOU AND NOT TO HARM YOU. He is the God of the rescue, but you have to do it His way.
