Joy of Home – Lesson 20

How do you handle disappointment and overwhelming things pushing at you? 

How do you handle disappointment and overwhelming things pushing at you?  On March first, 2024, my truck lost its ability to steer.  It had over 350,000 kms on it, and although I just filled the tank with fuel and flushed all the liquids under the hood, it was time to let it go.  I purchased a new vehicle, an SUV, and was on the road before the end of the day, on March 5th.  Also, at this time I decided to start a website, www.threecrossescanada.com, and it has eaten up so much of my time.  I have also been writing my devotional ‘Daily Walk in Tomorrow’ and this series, ‘Joy of Home.’  I have also been canning and dehydrating.  I work full time, have a house to clean, dinners to cook, keep up on watching Christian teachers and prophets, caring for my pets as they are shedding and need constant grooming, and although I have a spring and fall coat half sewn together it remains in a heap on my table.  I also have a yard that needs to be cleaned up as I have two large dogs, seeds to start sowing indoors for the garden outside, and I have done a few things to start my spring cleaning.

As I sit here writing, my house is disorganized.  I have boxes in the hallway of things that need to be given away, sorted through and either find a new home or be placed in the give away pile.  I have canning equipment and jars waiting to go back to their spots, and my broom awaits me for yet another dance around the house, sweeping up dog hair and dirt that they bring in.  Do I feel like nothing is getting done?  Sometimes.

I have made a list of things that need to be done, sooner than later.  Take today for instance, I didn’t get many of the things I wanted to get done, done, but I did, however, get my tomato and pepper seeds sown, some of my patterns I have to sell posted on my Etsy shop and I also got some important things done on my website. 

I get to choose whether I allow myself to get discouraged and overwhelmed.

I have come to realize that I will never get everything perfect, finished and accomplished.  The important thing is that I am trying to and trying to do it with excellence. 

Something that helps me is doing the ugly things first.   When I make lists, this really helps me.  If I put the most important things to do that day on the top of the list, they usually get done.  But right now, I have a very huge list that needs to get done before Easter, and there is a pressure trying to get on me, that says, why even bother, you will never get it all done.  Just skip doing it with excellence and miss a few corners.  These thoughts are not my thoughts, my thoughts say, do your very best, which is what excellence means, and I also say, I am not a quitter nor am I lazy.  A lazy man is not wise, nor is he fed, nor is he wealthy. 

Excellence means doing your best.

One of my goals for 2024 was written in an article I wrote called, “Don’t Mess Up Your Tomorrow by What You do Today.”  I wrote, “Bringing this awareness not to be lazy and tackle things without distractions is going to be a goal I will be applying.  Can I do more with what I am doing?  Recognizing time wasters is going to be one of the priorities I need to be fully aware of.”  Practicing this has been harder than I thought.  My phone beeps, and I pick it up, and half an hour later, I realize I just wasted thirty minutes of my life scrolling.  I am normally pretty picky with what I watch; however, once in a while I see a ‘stupid’ title and wonder what it is all about, and 30 minutes later, I say, “that was stupid, I lost 30 minutes of my life.”

Those days that I strap on my apron, roll up my sleeves, and have a plan for my day, I can and do accomplish much.  After work, if I put on determination to cook, clean, and do one simple chore, I feel much better as my head snuggles into the pillow. 

I MUST BE INTENTIONAL WITH EVERYTHING.  NOT IN FEAR BUT IN FAITH.

I need to always remind myself that I am not lazy.  I choose to pick up my dirty dishes and wash them, they don’t wash themselves.  I need to always remind myself that I can determine whether to be depressed, angry or sad.  I understand, as I worked in the healthcare industry for over ten years, that some people have a chemical imbalance; however, the majority of people do not.  If I offended you before, get yourself together, because it just might happen again.  Offense is a choice too.  Many people have been conditioned to fall victim to depression, anger, or sadness.  Have you ever heard the words, “you have a right to be angry.”  Or how about, “curl up with a bowl of ice cream, and watch sad movies.” 

You become what you think about.  I knew people who were elderly and would say, “I just know I am going to get cancer and die.”  They were healthy, active, and full of life, but that thought of ‘catching’ cancer got ahold of them and two years and much suffering later, they died.   You become what you think. 

I am sure you know someone who is always playing the victim card.  Nothing is ever their fault.  The world is against them, their boss hates them, their co-workers gossip about them, they grew up in a dysfunctional home, their best is never good enough, and so on.  What would happen if they changed what they said and thought?  I don’t care what the world thinks of me, I am beautiful, I do have talents and gifts, and I can be free to do all the things that I need and want to do.  I choose to forgive my co-workers for gossiping about me, and I will never gossip about them.  I forgive my parents, and as an adult take responsibility for my own life.   What camp do you want to be in?

We all face deadlines, whether you are a working mom who needs to have 24 cupcakes baked and frosted by Friday morning, or a nurse on a code blue.  Things you planned to do get reshuffled and replaced by a deadline.   How you think about these things will determine how you react to them.  You can tackle the problem with a negative or positive attitude. 

When I worked in healthcare, I worked mostly in homecare.  There were times when I would walk into a client’s home, and they had fallen, and a pool of blood was under their head.  I worked in long term care units, where you would be transferring a person from one room to another, and they died on the way.   I faced accidentally giving the wrong medication at the wrong time.  I faced verbal and physical abuse.  I dealt with people who were in so much pain, even gently touching them filled the atmosphere with screams.  I learned from day one, work stays at work and home stays at home.  I never took my work life home.  I never allowed myself the freedom to gossip, break confidentiality, or burden my family with what I saw or did at work.   If something like abuse needed to be exposed, I spoke to my superior.   If I needed to talk about something I was exposed to, I spoke to those in my field, and still held tightly to confidentiality.  There are things I know that no one else knows, and if even those things are exposed, no one knows I knew them before they were exposed.

The bible tells us to treat other people like we want to be treated.  If you tell me something, write to me (now available on my website), it will be held in confidentiality, and I expect the same in return.  You may be wondering what all this has to do with living in disappointment and being overwhelmed.  It comes down to what you believe in your heart which speaks.  If you want to know what someone really is like, listen to their words and see the fruit in their lives.

If someone is constantly gossiping, blaming, shaming or too lazy to bring their pizza plate back to the sink, why believe their words when they say, “I can do this or that.”  “You can talk to me, I will understand.”  Yes, tell your secrets to a gossiper.  Ask for help from a lazy person.  Now turn this around and ask yourself, am I these things?  I know, this can be painful, but it is eye opening. 

Why do you fall victim to disappointment and being overwhelmed?   Are you believing in something that really is not there or are you simply hanging on to something, so you can be disappointed?  I know people who before they even start their day, believe for disappointment.  “Why even get out of bed, I know this is going to be another crappy day.”  “Nothing ever goes my way.”   “I will never make enough money to get out of debt.”    Why are they overwhelmed?  “I cannot get it all done.”  “Nobody ever helps me.”  “I need to unwind in front of the television after work.”  “You cannot understand the stressful day I had, this person did this, and that person said this.”

You choose your response.  You choose to be lazy or not.  You choose whether to be depressed or not.  Even at a funeral, you can choose to be a victim or a mourner, or someone who chooses to celebrate that person’s life. 

Throughout the ‘Joy of Home’ series, we have talked about doing something, thinking differently, because doing and saying the same thing over and over, is insanity.

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